A few weeks ago I decided to go cross-country skiing on my way home from working in Manila. There is a place that I have gone skiing at before and thought I would go there. It is easy to get to, not far from the highway, has a good place to park the car, I have cell phone coverage most of the time, and it is an easy ski. It was fairly early in the afternoon so I had a couple of hours before dusk and the drop of temperatures.
After putting on the equipment, I took off down this graded logging road to get to the open valley.
Snowmobilers had been there in the past several days, so I followed their tracks. It is easier because the snow is packed down somewhat and you don't have to break a new trail.
It was a beautiful day and I needed time to get a way and think. I skied close to the trees and spent lots of time pondering the issues and decisions I have been concerned with, and just enjoying the beauty around me. It was so peaceful, cold, but peaceful and something I really needed at the time. After skiing a while, I checked the time and decided I had a few more minutes before it was time to turn back. A tree in the distance was my mark to turn around. A few minutes later I reached the tree and turned back.
The sun position had changed and the shadows were a little longer than before so I moved out into the valley where there wasn't as much shade. Again, I just skied and enjoyed being out and away. Some time passed by. I wondered why I hadn't seen the logging road that would take me to my car. Looking at my watch, I decided it had probably just taken a little longer to ski back, so I continued on thinking the road would be right ahead of me.
Well, the road wasn't ahead of me, in fact, I didn't know where it was. There was no way, I thought, that I could have missed the road so I kept on skiing. The shadows were getting longer and the valley was mostly in shade. Temperatures were beginning to dip a little. I called Mike and told him where I was and that it would be a little later than expected before I would get home. Still looking for the road, I could not see it anywhere. I skied back to the north and up on a little knoll hoping to locate the trail I needed to take. It was nowhere to be seen, and it was getting harder to pick things out. I called Mike again, and let him know what the situation was.
Since I could hear the cars on the main highway to the west of me, Mike suggested I just ski towards the road, then hike back to the car. It seemed reasonable, after all, the highway was only half to two-thirds a mile to the west. So, off I went. What a mistake! It was clear for a while, the snow was deep, but not too bad. Then a wall of trees appeared before me. I mean a literal wall! The pine trees were only two to three feet apart and difficult, if not impossible to maneuver around. The skis would sink and I would be in snow to my knees or higher. Finally I decided to take the skis off and try to hike. Not a good choice either. I sank into the snow up to my upper thighs and my feet would get caught on the rocks and fallen debris under the snow. Several times my ankles twisted and I would fall. I was getting covered in snow and getting cold.
I put my skis back on and tried again, to no avail. Not only could I not navigate the skis, but I was having to meander through the trees to even find a way through them. Frustrated, and scared, I realized that if anything happened to me in the trees, no one would know where to look for me. Turning toward the valley, I made my way back to open space and cell phone service.
The sun had gone down, and the full moon was up. Stars were beginning to appear in the skies, and I was very scared at this point. I called Mike again and told him that I couldn't make it to the highway and really did not know if the access road was to the north or south of me. Fear was interfering with my ability to be coherent and make rational decisions. Nothing looked familiar in the moonlight and I didn't know which way to go. I turned to prayer, but again, fear got in the way of me following the promptings to head north. For several yards I would ski north, but then doubt that decision and backtrack to the south. It was cold. It was dark. I continued the pattern of ski north, doubt, turn around and go south. Mike said he was on his way.
Later, after several phone calls to check up on me, Mike called and said he was at my car and that our son-in-law and his father were on their way with snowmobiles. Could I hear the car horn honking? No. Could I hear the whistle? No. Keep skiing north. OK--but, again I would doubt. During one of the phone calls I dropped a glove and didn't realize it until I reached to put it back on. My hands were very cold and I needed the glove, so I backtracked once again, this time to locate my glove.
I moved closer to the trees as I headed towards north. Maybe I had been too far out in the valley and really did miss the access road. I wasn't even skiing at this point, just trudging along wondering which direction I really should be going. Then I heard it! The wonderful sounds of snowmobiles starting up. Mike called and asked if I could hear them. YES!!! I could! They were to the northwest of me (I thought--again, I doubted because maybe the sounds were just echoing in the valley). I kept trudging, and then a wonderful sight! Lights coming through the trees!
What relief, and at the same time frustration. I was only 150 to 200 yards south of the access road! If I had just kept heading north instead of backtracking, I would have been to the road! (Later I went back and clocked approximately how far I had skied past the road--about 2 1/2 miles.) Josh and his dad drove up to me then pulled my skis and gloves off. Josh put warm gloves on me, a hat, helmet, and goggles. He put me on the snowmobile behind him and drove me to the car. Jim, Josh's dad, carried my skis and poles.
In their snowmobile trailer I stood in front of the propane heater, warmed up, and cried. I was so grateful, so embarrassed, so frustrated with myself, and so scared. I shook uncontrollably, but I was safe.
Looking back, I realize I missed the road because I wasn't paying close enough attention and because by skiing away from the trees and in the valley, my view of the road was obstructed. I also realize that Heavenly Father was answering my prayers--He was prompting me to go north to find the road, but I had let my tremendous fear get in the way of having the faith to follow those promptings. So many lessons learned, but the one foremost in my mind was the lesson that "Where there is fear, faith is absent."
What an embarrassing and frustrating event. Nearly five hours after beginning my little ski, I was brought to my car and headed for home. I am grateful to be here, for family who came to the rescue of a middle-aged lady who is losing her mind, and for the very real reminder of the role of faith in following promptings from the Lord.
Easter morning with Roux. He wasn't sure about this egg hunting stuff at first, but once he figured it out there was no stopping him! We colored a few eggs the night before and Roux was fascinated with colored eggs. After he went to bed, Vi and I hid the eggs around the apartment for Roux to find Sunday morning. 
Vi and Roux walking around the ponds and looking at the ducks. Roux saw the bubbling of the water pump in the pond and insisted it was a whale--so then, we tried to find the whales.
Poppa and Deegan went up to check on the new calf. Seriously, this calf was about 125 pounds when it was born. That is huge! Deegan named the calf Optimus Prime (transformer dude). Mike added the last name of Rib. Now the official name is Optimus Prime Rib.
